I've really had my head stuck in the clouds for the past couple of weeks. I'm daydreaming about the time that I'll be working as a restorative exercise specialist, helping people get their bodies back in alignment. I've been picturing the layout of a clinic I'd like to open, I've been making notes for seminars I want to do. I've set lots of goals over the years, both short and long term, and I'm at it again. To help myself, and you as well, I've made a short list of 3 helpful handy hints when it comes to setting goals, or as I like to call it, "Goal Digging".
Tip number 1: Dont' be afraid to take your time and look as far down the road as you'd like.
A wise man once said "He goin' make into a Benz out of that Datson. He got that ambition baby, look in his eyes. This week he moppin' floors, next week it's tha fries", and truly those are inspiring words we can all live by. It's not about where you are now, it's about working toward your goals step by step. You're not going to reach your goal over night (unless your goal is eating an entire extra large pizza in one sitting. In which case, shut the blinds so no one can see what a freak you are). You've got a long life ahead of you, (unless you're eating extra large pizzas every day) so it's fine to take your time to really work hard to reach the goal you've set. Take the clinic I want to open. I only just started the first part of my alignment course. I still have to master 17 DVDs worth of exercises, know them by heart, what they're for, who can do them, what the modifications are for those with injuries, etc. Then I have to go down south to either Washington or California to get certified. After that I'll have to work for a while to build up clients and money to open the clinic. Plus Myriam will have to be in school because I can't take care of her and run a business like that full time...the point is, it's a long, LONG way off. But that does not stop me from setting my goal, and taking baby steps toward it each and every day.
Tip number 2: Don't let your life NOW get in the way of your life LATER.
This can apply to so many things! Remember when you were 10 and you had to have a new bike because the one you were riding was grey and not a cool color and hurt your nether regions every time you landed a sweet jump? Did you let your life (unemployed, broke, still in school) stop you from achieving your goals? No! You worked hard every day, always making time to bug the shit out of your parents to get you a new bike, and you succeeded! Good job asshole, now your parents are going to be late with their mortgage payment this month, but you achieved your goal and that's what matters.
Maybe you'd like to train to be a graphic designer so you don't have to work at Tim Horton's when you're 40, but you have a 2 year old preventing you from going back to school full time. Don't let that little brat stop you! Think about going back part time, or if that's not an option, start doing some self learning (buying books, researching on the interwebs) so that you'll be really prepared when your crappy kid is finally in Kindergarten. Go back to the first tip of not being afraid to make your goal a long term one. Slowing down is ok, but you don't have to give up on your dreams just because you have an obstacle in your life right now.
Tip number 3: Change the way you think about working toward a goal.
I'm sure we've all heard the old adage "Life is about the journey" or whatever it is they say, but it is true. Don't discount the path you take from point A to point B. I know it's going to take me several years to reach some of my goals (like getting a diamond studded golden grill for my teeth) but that doesn't mean I'm in limbo until I get there. Use your time wisely in a way that makes you happy now and propels you ever closer to your goal. If you go back to handy tip 2, and make sure you're not making excuses for not working toward your goal, hopefully you won't ever feel like you're just waiting around for all your magical dreams to come true.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to stretch my hamstrings. My goal is to be able to touch my toes in 7 years, but I have to work on it now if I ever want that to happen.
Showing posts with label general life stuff. Show all posts
Showing posts with label general life stuff. Show all posts
Nov 3, 2011
Oct 3, 2011
You see what you want to see.
I know I complain a lot about my kid, but mostly I'm just kidding. The truth is, she's nothing more and nothing less than herself. She needs to be picked up more often than other babies. She has an unpredictable sleep schedule. She may or may not eat when food is placed in front of her. Sometimes she nurses 3 or 4 times at night.
She also does a lot of really cool stuff. She usually asks for the potty (even at restaurants) when she has to pinch one off. I can count on one hand the dirty diapers I change in a month. She says a lot of words, always knows when it's her dad on the phone, recognizes pictures of her grandparents, and always knows to say "Bop" (pop) right after she says Nan. When her Baby Einstein video says the word "friend", she looks at me and says "Mai?" because Mai is the little girl next door, her best friend.
So, high needs, low needs, mad skills, no skills, she just is what she is. The hard part of my job is having the patience to deal with the times when her "flaws" seem the greatest. That gets me to thinking about labels again (click), and how we tend to label benign traits according to how convenient or inconvenient they are for us. For example, Myriam needs a great deal of attention and physical contact. Some people call it needy, clingy, or say she's too dependant. But you could also see this trait as securly attatched, bonded, or loving. Another example is when we go out places, or have new people visit our home; she takes a while to relax and be at ease. She's really "sensitive". Or shy. Or a scaredy-cat. Or, as I would rather see it, she's very perceptive, and aware of her surroundings. She's not a wimp, she has an analytical mind, and needs to figure things out before she's fully comfortable.
See what I'm getting at here? None of these traits are either negative or positive, but the words we attach to the traits give them a good or a bad value. It's a classic glass half full, glass half empty scenario. Personally, when describing my daughter, and life in general, I'd much rather be going around with my glass half full. And when there's only a drop left in the bottom, I want to exclaim "Sweet! There's still a drop left in here!".
She also does a lot of really cool stuff. She usually asks for the potty (even at restaurants) when she has to pinch one off. I can count on one hand the dirty diapers I change in a month. She says a lot of words, always knows when it's her dad on the phone, recognizes pictures of her grandparents, and always knows to say "Bop" (pop) right after she says Nan. When her Baby Einstein video says the word "friend", she looks at me and says "Mai?" because Mai is the little girl next door, her best friend.
So, high needs, low needs, mad skills, no skills, she just is what she is. The hard part of my job is having the patience to deal with the times when her "flaws" seem the greatest. That gets me to thinking about labels again (click), and how we tend to label benign traits according to how convenient or inconvenient they are for us. For example, Myriam needs a great deal of attention and physical contact. Some people call it needy, clingy, or say she's too dependant. But you could also see this trait as securly attatched, bonded, or loving. Another example is when we go out places, or have new people visit our home; she takes a while to relax and be at ease. She's really "sensitive". Or shy. Or a scaredy-cat. Or, as I would rather see it, she's very perceptive, and aware of her surroundings. She's not a wimp, she has an analytical mind, and needs to figure things out before she's fully comfortable.
See what I'm getting at here? None of these traits are either negative or positive, but the words we attach to the traits give them a good or a bad value. It's a classic glass half full, glass half empty scenario. Personally, when describing my daughter, and life in general, I'd much rather be going around with my glass half full. And when there's only a drop left in the bottom, I want to exclaim "Sweet! There's still a drop left in here!".
Jul 11, 2011
Pride and Prejudice and Professionalism.
I'm not gonna lie, I love good manners. Or perhaps it's proper etiquette that I love. Actually, I think it's both. I love it when people hold doors for each other, say thank you, compliment each other's shoes in the elevator. Nothing charms and entices me like a razor sharp outfit, and nothing ruins my day more than an inappropriately dressed person (I'm talking about YOU, muffin tops at the shoe store, stop wearing lingerie to work. I wouldn't buy shoes from you if my feet were covered in scabs and I was going for a walk on the sun). I even love entertainment that is about behaving appropriately (I'm pathetic). Know what my favorite movie is? Pride and Prejudice, not because of the romance, but because of how everyone is so prim and proper. Last summer I read Portrait of a Lady loved that too. I'm sure some people find that stuff boring, or pompous, or superficial, but I think it makes the world nicer to look at, and nicer to live in.
It's not such a bad thing to be interested in though, because I think my mild obsession with etiquette has given me a bit of an edge in my business life, since being professional goes hand in hand with manners and etiquette. Every client gets treated the same way, and whether I'm going to someone's office for a meeting, or going to pick up a bunch of dollar store t shirts at someone's house, I never show up in jeans and sneakers.
I've been thinking a lot about professionalism, and how some people have it, but most people just don't. I got off the phone with my t shirt supplier on a Friday and was shocked to find that an order I placed early in the week, and had received confirmation of shipment for TWICE, was in fact, sitting on their warehouse floor, in a pile of boxes that were waiting to be picked up by customers. It sat on the floor for 4 days, even after I called to be sure it was on its way to me. Even after I was TOLD it was on its way to me. When I finally became aware of this gross error (after calling again to get them to track the package) I was furious, but polite (as usual) but the guy on the phone was all "oh, shit happens. i feel bad. it must have been the guy who packed the box". I have not received any further correspondence from the rep I usually deal with, though he is probably aware of the problem.
The point of my long winded story is: it was crazy unprofessional. To shag up a client's order and then act like it was some random thing that happens all the time is ridiculous in my opinion. Needless to say, I'm taking my business else where. I can't stand working with unprofessional businesses, and thank goodness, I do have a choice in suppliers. I can drop a shitty supplier as fast as I'd pop C.Cassie in the mouth if I ever met her/him.
The really unfortunate thing is when your own clients are crazy unprofessional. Things like being really late with a payment, or not giving me an order in on time so it either holds me up or ends up making me have to rush like a madwoman to finish a job, not being there when you say you will be (and I end up carting my 10 month old around town in the 40 degree heat of the summer for nothing). It bothers me when I can't get hold of a client for days at a time, so I can't confirm proofs with them, and have my printing press held hostage until someone remembers to email me back "yup. that works. go for it". Not cool, not very businesslike.
Sucks to your assmar though, you can't send an angry letter to a client, or even act irritated with them at all. Unless, of course, you really like bridge burning, shooting yourself in the foot, biting the hand that feeds you, etc. etc. I'm not into any of those things! luckily I have those nice manners to fall back on, and I try to keep a disposition that enables me to brush off all that crap that drives me insane about people. Unless I'm being mistreated, or a client is doing something that is really wrecking my life, I tend to just suck it up and try my best to be more clear in the future about timing, payment, things of that nature.
Now, if you'll excuse me, someone on my street is riding a mini bike. It is loud, irritating, and risks waking my baby (then I'll have to *eugh* take care of her...) I find this to be extremely rude, so I gotta go bust up some kneecaps and make this neighbourhood a nicer place to live in.
It's not such a bad thing to be interested in though, because I think my mild obsession with etiquette has given me a bit of an edge in my business life, since being professional goes hand in hand with manners and etiquette. Every client gets treated the same way, and whether I'm going to someone's office for a meeting, or going to pick up a bunch of dollar store t shirts at someone's house, I never show up in jeans and sneakers.
I've been thinking a lot about professionalism, and how some people have it, but most people just don't. I got off the phone with my t shirt supplier on a Friday and was shocked to find that an order I placed early in the week, and had received confirmation of shipment for TWICE, was in fact, sitting on their warehouse floor, in a pile of boxes that were waiting to be picked up by customers. It sat on the floor for 4 days, even after I called to be sure it was on its way to me. Even after I was TOLD it was on its way to me. When I finally became aware of this gross error (after calling again to get them to track the package) I was furious, but polite (as usual) but the guy on the phone was all "oh, shit happens. i feel bad. it must have been the guy who packed the box". I have not received any further correspondence from the rep I usually deal with, though he is probably aware of the problem.
The point of my long winded story is: it was crazy unprofessional. To shag up a client's order and then act like it was some random thing that happens all the time is ridiculous in my opinion. Needless to say, I'm taking my business else where. I can't stand working with unprofessional businesses, and thank goodness, I do have a choice in suppliers. I can drop a shitty supplier as fast as I'd pop C.Cassie in the mouth if I ever met her/him.
The really unfortunate thing is when your own clients are crazy unprofessional. Things like being really late with a payment, or not giving me an order in on time so it either holds me up or ends up making me have to rush like a madwoman to finish a job, not being there when you say you will be (and I end up carting my 10 month old around town in the 40 degree heat of the summer for nothing). It bothers me when I can't get hold of a client for days at a time, so I can't confirm proofs with them, and have my printing press held hostage until someone remembers to email me back "yup. that works. go for it". Not cool, not very businesslike.
Sucks to your assmar though, you can't send an angry letter to a client, or even act irritated with them at all. Unless, of course, you really like bridge burning, shooting yourself in the foot, biting the hand that feeds you, etc. etc. I'm not into any of those things! luckily I have those nice manners to fall back on, and I try to keep a disposition that enables me to brush off all that crap that drives me insane about people. Unless I'm being mistreated, or a client is doing something that is really wrecking my life, I tend to just suck it up and try my best to be more clear in the future about timing, payment, things of that nature.
Now, if you'll excuse me, someone on my street is riding a mini bike. It is loud, irritating, and risks waking my baby (then I'll have to *eugh* take care of her...) I find this to be extremely rude, so I gotta go bust up some kneecaps and make this neighbourhood a nicer place to live in.
May 19, 2011
It's a Mom-lemma.
The slow moving change of my life is about to get another jolt, and I am nervous. I've been a work at home mom since my baby was 6 weeks old, but up until now I've had my spouse home to share the domestic and child care duties. This allowed me to get lots of work done during the day and not have to worry if my 6 month old was upstairs lighting fires or eating paint. However, as of June 6th, the man is going back to work and the woman (me, I'm a woman) is staying home to hold down the fort, mind the youngster, AND run a business.
I thought I was going to have it made when my neighbour, a stay at home dad who has a child the same age as mine, suggested we team up. I was all "shit yea, son, let's do it up", until I heard what he had in mind for the division of labour. He would be "taking care" of all the hanging out, sleeping in, and playing video games, while I took over all the mom duties. Needless to say, I think I can manage without the "help".
I think what's going to happen is that I'll be doing a lot of evening and weekend work, while taking care of Mimi during the day. Sure I can do the odd thing like invoicing, ordering stock and supplies, printing transparencies etc. while Myriam is chilling next to me. But the more time sensitive tasks (like exposing and coating screens) or the tasks that require a substantial chunk of time (printing 300 shirts, for example) can not be done while tending to a small child.
A friend of mine is a graphic designer with 2 kids, and she has someone come to her home to babysit the youngest while the oldest is in daycare. That way she can be productive for 2 or 3 hours during the day and not have to scamper away to work the second her husband gets home. I'd love to do the same, but other than my sister in law (who may or may not have the time to come) I don't really know anybody who can help out!
I've got a mom-lemma...or I'm a dilem-mom...or I make really terrible jokes. At least I've got a hierarchy of stuff in my life which removes the burden of choice. I can't choose between making a deadline or taking care of my baby. Even when she has boogs in her nose and inflicts grievous bodily harm (her nails are sharp!) she's still going to be more important than my work. Alternatively, my work is going to take precedence over my sleep, but sleep is usually more important than eating, or at least eating healthy. Seriously, when you're up early every morning, what would you rather do at night when you finish work: take an hour to prepare a healthy meal, then have to spend another 20 or 30 minutes eating said meal, or cram some chips in your face and then crawl into bed and pass out?
I guess I'll have to start getting even more creative with my time management. I just thought of my first time saver! I'll eat the chips IN bed! If anyone has any other helpful short cuts like that, do me a solid and send them my way. I'll be sure to share all mine with you!
I thought I was going to have it made when my neighbour, a stay at home dad who has a child the same age as mine, suggested we team up. I was all "shit yea, son, let's do it up", until I heard what he had in mind for the division of labour. He would be "taking care" of all the hanging out, sleeping in, and playing video games, while I took over all the mom duties. Needless to say, I think I can manage without the "help".
I think what's going to happen is that I'll be doing a lot of evening and weekend work, while taking care of Mimi during the day. Sure I can do the odd thing like invoicing, ordering stock and supplies, printing transparencies etc. while Myriam is chilling next to me. But the more time sensitive tasks (like exposing and coating screens) or the tasks that require a substantial chunk of time (printing 300 shirts, for example) can not be done while tending to a small child.
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| Even a baby this cute throws fits and needs her mom sometimes. |
A friend of mine is a graphic designer with 2 kids, and she has someone come to her home to babysit the youngest while the oldest is in daycare. That way she can be productive for 2 or 3 hours during the day and not have to scamper away to work the second her husband gets home. I'd love to do the same, but other than my sister in law (who may or may not have the time to come) I don't really know anybody who can help out!
I've got a mom-lemma...or I'm a dilem-mom...or I make really terrible jokes. At least I've got a hierarchy of stuff in my life which removes the burden of choice. I can't choose between making a deadline or taking care of my baby. Even when she has boogs in her nose and inflicts grievous bodily harm (her nails are sharp!) she's still going to be more important than my work. Alternatively, my work is going to take precedence over my sleep, but sleep is usually more important than eating, or at least eating healthy. Seriously, when you're up early every morning, what would you rather do at night when you finish work: take an hour to prepare a healthy meal, then have to spend another 20 or 30 minutes eating said meal, or cram some chips in your face and then crawl into bed and pass out?
I guess I'll have to start getting even more creative with my time management. I just thought of my first time saver! I'll eat the chips IN bed! If anyone has any other helpful short cuts like that, do me a solid and send them my way. I'll be sure to share all mine with you!
Feb 19, 2011
on creativity
So, there's this awesome video of Thom Yorke dancing to "Lotus Flower" that came out this week (I think?). Both myself and Myri really enjoyed watching it the other morning when it popped up a bunch of times on my facebook news feed. As I was watching it again this morning, it got me wondering about how people get to moving like that, and then how people get to making music like that, or how people get to drawing the way they do. I asked myself how people get to be creative in general.
It's a pertinent issue to me, as I myself am pretty creative (and working on being more so), and I want to foster my daughter's creativity as she grows. It will strike me as odd if she turns out to be a world class Muay Thai fighter, and never touches a Staedtler or a Micron in her life. Though I'm assuming that her impressive musical and visual arts lineage will impart some type of creativity to her, I also want to know how best to augment whatever it is in her nature to be.
When I think back to my own childhood and what might have made me the way I am (besides my awesome genetics), I recall spending lots of time alone. That's it. Except for a few months of gymnastics when I was 6, and piano once a week for a few years, my time was all my own. I can't imagine a life where every day of the week was a different class, along with homework, studying, and family time. After all that, when is there time to think and develop one's own ideas? It takes more than 15 minutes of free time before bed to become a Kahlo, or a Dostoevsky.
Perhaps in the end it's all genetics. Maybe some kids, when left to their own devices become shiftless hooligans, out dealing crack at all hours of the night. I won't say I wasn't a shiftless hooligan, it's just that I was up drawing or writing poetry by candle light at all hours of the night (I was such a tortured soul when I was 15) instead of pushing drugs on street corners.
No art classes, no summer camps, no weekend creative writing groups. Just me and my sketchbook, which never left my side from the age of 13 onward. I guess what I'm trying to get at is that even the most well intentioned structure can be stifling for creativity, especially when there's a lot of it. I guess I'll wait and see when it comes to Mimi. If she wants to take kickboxing after school, I'm not going to stop her. But I'm certainly not going to force her into classes she doesn't want to take. I mean, just think of how Thom Yorke would dance if he had been sent to dance classes after school? Or if he was also in Cadets, Boy Scouts, and the Chess Club? Not like he does in that video, that's for sure.
It's a pertinent issue to me, as I myself am pretty creative (and working on being more so), and I want to foster my daughter's creativity as she grows. It will strike me as odd if she turns out to be a world class Muay Thai fighter, and never touches a Staedtler or a Micron in her life. Though I'm assuming that her impressive musical and visual arts lineage will impart some type of creativity to her, I also want to know how best to augment whatever it is in her nature to be.
When I think back to my own childhood and what might have made me the way I am (besides my awesome genetics), I recall spending lots of time alone. That's it. Except for a few months of gymnastics when I was 6, and piano once a week for a few years, my time was all my own. I can't imagine a life where every day of the week was a different class, along with homework, studying, and family time. After all that, when is there time to think and develop one's own ideas? It takes more than 15 minutes of free time before bed to become a Kahlo, or a Dostoevsky.
Perhaps in the end it's all genetics. Maybe some kids, when left to their own devices become shiftless hooligans, out dealing crack at all hours of the night. I won't say I wasn't a shiftless hooligan, it's just that I was up drawing or writing poetry by candle light at all hours of the night (I was such a tortured soul when I was 15) instead of pushing drugs on street corners.
No art classes, no summer camps, no weekend creative writing groups. Just me and my sketchbook, which never left my side from the age of 13 onward. I guess what I'm trying to get at is that even the most well intentioned structure can be stifling for creativity, especially when there's a lot of it. I guess I'll wait and see when it comes to Mimi. If she wants to take kickboxing after school, I'm not going to stop her. But I'm certainly not going to force her into classes she doesn't want to take. I mean, just think of how Thom Yorke would dance if he had been sent to dance classes after school? Or if he was also in Cadets, Boy Scouts, and the Chess Club? Not like he does in that video, that's for sure.
Feb 9, 2011
Waiting for the perfect moment.
I really like writing this blog. For me, this blog is a link to a part of me that I don't get to express very much in my day to day life. All day long my thoughts are consumed by Myriam, and my time is consumed by mundane tasks that pile up if they don't get taken care of right away (hello, cloth diapers). I'm typically doing 2 or 3 things at once; cooking while I wash dishes and dance for M in her high chair, folding laundry while wearing the baby on my back. Checking out facebook while M is hanging off my boob. I've become remarkably domestic. While it's nice that I've been able to adapt to my new role in life, it makes me sad that there's a substantial part of me that's being pushed to the backburner for now.
When the midget is out of my hair (either sleeping or downstairs with her dad) and the timing is just right (I'm not too hungry, there's not too many chores piled up, my online banking is done, the moon is in the seventh house, etc. etc.) then I can really let loose and write a post. I know, how exciting, a blog post is how I let loose. Whatever, shut up. It IS exciting for me becuase it's the only occasion that I can focus on creativity, writing, business, and just random thoughts that *don't* revolve directly around the midget.
Here's the problem though, Myriam needs me all the time, I'm always hungry, there are always chores piled up, I NEVER do my online banking, and I don't even know what the seventh house is! So you see, the timing is never just right for me to let loose. I am always waiting for the perfect moment, and that moment never seems to arrive. My mother told me this, when I was not sure if it was the right time to try to have a baby. She said to me "Jillian, there it's never a right time. But you do it anyways". Thanks mom. No, seriously. That is some good advice.
Maybe you want to start a business, or have a baby, or write a blog post, but you're waiting around for something (an invitation perhaps?) It's never gonna happen. I may as well shut down my blog if I'm only going to post during an ideal moment. Right now, I am eating supper that I cooked while writing this post, nursing my baby, and finishing this post with my one free hand. Evidently, the perfect moment is now.
When the midget is out of my hair (either sleeping or downstairs with her dad) and the timing is just right (I'm not too hungry, there's not too many chores piled up, my online banking is done, the moon is in the seventh house, etc. etc.) then I can really let loose and write a post. I know, how exciting, a blog post is how I let loose. Whatever, shut up. It IS exciting for me becuase it's the only occasion that I can focus on creativity, writing, business, and just random thoughts that *don't* revolve directly around the midget.
Here's the problem though, Myriam needs me all the time, I'm always hungry, there are always chores piled up, I NEVER do my online banking, and I don't even know what the seventh house is! So you see, the timing is never just right for me to let loose. I am always waiting for the perfect moment, and that moment never seems to arrive. My mother told me this, when I was not sure if it was the right time to try to have a baby. She said to me "Jillian, there it's never a right time. But you do it anyways". Thanks mom. No, seriously. That is some good advice.
Maybe you want to start a business, or have a baby, or write a blog post, but you're waiting around for something (an invitation perhaps?) It's never gonna happen. I may as well shut down my blog if I'm only going to post during an ideal moment. Right now, I am eating supper that I cooked while writing this post, nursing my baby, and finishing this post with my one free hand. Evidently, the perfect moment is now.
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| Multi tasking: crocheting while caring for Myri. |
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