Jul 20, 2009

Working for one's self is very mysterious.

I'm sitting here at my temp job thinking about what my life could be like. Dress up nice every day, walk or bike to work at 7:30 in the morning, sit in an office sipping coffee and doing menial tasks all day, answer the phone, read a book... It doesn't seem so bad. Yet every time I've been in this position (and it has been many times) it never fails that I end up hating my life in less than a month. Instead, I choose to drive for almost 45 minutes in rush hour traffic to hunch over a sewing machine all day, or be on my feet cutting fabric for hours at a time. After almost 5 months as a seamstress, I still don't hate my life, in fact I still enjoy going to work and even get...dare I say, EXCITED about going in from time to time! It makes me think back to my days of screen printing at Living Planet. I didn't even realize I was happy until my mother mentioned to me that it was the first time I'd had a job that I didn't complain about, not even once. Apparently I preferred to bus in the rain at 7 a.m. and partake in grueling physical labour, leaving my body aching and sometimes injured. The real mystery here is that when I work at an office, I can usually make from 30% to 50% more than what I make as a screen printer or seamstress, yet I still run from the office like I'd run from the plague, or a musical *shudder*. That means I'd rather do work that is physically exhausting and live under the poverty line than relax in some office and make enough money to buy shoes, live, and save for a house all at the same time. What the hell, me? What's my problem?

An even greater mystery still is why I'd rather work to find work, and then work even harder to complete that work (as opposed to having an office job, where the work is always handed to you in a neat little package and you are trained on how to complete it) Now, I'm gearing up to spend a lot of money that I don't have on setting up a studio. This may be the biggest mystery yet: I'm willing to pay money and go into debt to do work that I have to bust my ass to find, pays less (at first anyway), and is more physically demanding than all my office jobs put together.

I don't have any answers to these mysterious mysteries, except that I hate working, I hate schedules, and I HATE HATE HATE being bored (which is what office work is, boring with a capital "lame".) I've got my sketch book with me today and tomorrow, (I'm temping again tomorrow) and hopefully relaxing at this desk will turn into 2 days of being creative. I hope to be writing, drawing, and maybe taking a little reading break when my fingers start bleeding from all the typing and drawing. I'll leave you with a link (don't know how to embed) to one of my all time favorite songs. Rap and Opera?? Scandelous!! It can't be!! Yes it can, and it's amazing. Check it out :)